A necessary antidote

I could not believe it when I saw coverage of the Michael Jackson funeral when I turned on ... ESPN!!! ESP effin' N!!! My Gawd, is it actually possible for Michael Jackson to be more annoying in death than he was in life? Was he trying to pull an Obi-Wan Kenobi?

I liked his early music, but he actually peaked before Thriller (think "Don't Stop 'til You Get Enough" and "Rock With You"), and by 1988's "Dirty Diana," his last decent (notice I did not say "good") hit, he was already on fumes. Everything since has been mediocre to bad, though not even approaching John Mellencamp depths of musical terrorism. Michael Jackson was pretty damn good, but for a guy whose last decent hit was 21 years ago, this is ridiculous.

There is only one antidote for all this Michael Jackson. Only one thing can save us. You need it. I need it. We all need it. That's right, children -- we need Emmanuelle Vaugier.


ALL EMMANUELLE VAUGIER, ALL THE TIME!!!